Game Recaps:
This week Dan copped a large serve of abuse from several disgruntled teammates regarding his new roster policy. And with the challenge of B-Grade opponents this week, things weren’t looking good for our heroes or Gemma.
Game 1: Chug Monkeys versus Wilson
This opponent used to give the Chug Monkeys a pounding back in their early days. However this game was payback time. The Chug Monkeys fired up their high octane attack and trounced all who stood in their path. Sadly this actually included their own teammates at times, with Project Gemma taking a slam to the face from Trent. But like all good Chug Monkeys Gem soldiered on to join in one of the best Chug Monkey wins to date. Way to take it like a Dan Gem.
Approx Final Score: 50-20
Game 2: Chug Monkeys versus ???
Well whoever we played, they sucked royal! Fortunately they had this cute blonde chick on their team which made a boring ass game all the worthwhile (WingMan Bruce’s words, not mine).
Approx Final Score: 63-24
Season Record:
25 Wins
17 Loses
Inside the Chug Monkeys:
This week Dan copped a large serve of abuse from several disgruntled teammates regarding his new roster policy. And with the challenge of B-Grade opponents this week, things weren’t looking good for our heroes or Gemma.
Game 1: Chug Monkeys versus Wilson
This opponent used to give the Chug Monkeys a pounding back in their early days. However this game was payback time. The Chug Monkeys fired up their high octane attack and trounced all who stood in their path. Sadly this actually included their own teammates at times, with Project Gemma taking a slam to the face from Trent. But like all good Chug Monkeys Gem soldiered on to join in one of the best Chug Monkey wins to date. Way to take it like a Dan Gem.
Approx Final Score: 50-20
Game 2: Chug Monkeys versus ???
Well whoever we played, they sucked royal! Fortunately they had this cute blonde chick on their team which made a boring ass game all the worthwhile (WingMan Bruce’s words, not mine).
Approx Final Score: 63-24
Season Record:
25 Wins
17 Loses
Inside the Chug Monkeys:
The Chug Monkey Dan reality series part 2
(The Net Offensive)
This week Chug Monkey Dan again takes ‘Inside the Chug Monkeys’ to strange new places as he experiments with online dating at RSVP. Here are the final results:
Chug Monkey Dan is frequently associated with the word ‘offensive’, however this week it was in an entirely context. After checking his online dating profile on an hourly basis last week, Dan had not received a single hit. No doubt the ladies were intimidated by Chug Monkey Dan’s unique for of beauty or perhaps a giant server crash occurred when everyone rushed to view Dan’s profile at once. Clearly a change of plan was needed, so Dan decided to go on the offensive by sending a free hello msg to several young ladies. In marketing we call this a ‘push strategy’ and as you know Chug Monkey Dan is all about pushing it to the limits. .
By end of Chug Monkey Dan’s ‘Net Offensive’ he had actually received up to 4 responses with complimentary feedback for Dan’s profile and a request for a photo. The question then is, what they hell is wrong with these women?! Dan’s profile was shallow sexist and by no means pleasant, yet still some ladies couldn’t resist. Dan therefore decided to leave online dating to the physco paths and delete his profile post haste.
For those of you who didn’t view the profile it copy and pasted below…and I await your response ;)
However the scariest thing of all was that a chick from a rival volleyball team had a profile on RSVP, but sadly it wasn’t that hot chick from court 4.
The Profile:
(Again please keep in mind this was not a serious attempt at online dating!!!!!!!!!!!)
ChugMonkeyDan25
Hello and welcome to the Chug Monkey Dan experiment. As you’ve probably already noticed, the guys on this website appear to be from the shallow end of the gene pool. So when RSVP needed some fresh talent for their website and Brad Pitt was already taken, naturally I was the first person they contacted. So this is a limited time offer RSVP has set up for all you ladies to get on board the Chug Monkey Dan train…quite literally if you wish.
(The Net Offensive)
This week Chug Monkey Dan again takes ‘Inside the Chug Monkeys’ to strange new places as he experiments with online dating at RSVP. Here are the final results:
Chug Monkey Dan is frequently associated with the word ‘offensive’, however this week it was in an entirely context. After checking his online dating profile on an hourly basis last week, Dan had not received a single hit. No doubt the ladies were intimidated by Chug Monkey Dan’s unique for of beauty or perhaps a giant server crash occurred when everyone rushed to view Dan’s profile at once. Clearly a change of plan was needed, so Dan decided to go on the offensive by sending a free hello msg to several young ladies. In marketing we call this a ‘push strategy’ and as you know Chug Monkey Dan is all about pushing it to the limits. .
By end of Chug Monkey Dan’s ‘Net Offensive’ he had actually received up to 4 responses with complimentary feedback for Dan’s profile and a request for a photo. The question then is, what they hell is wrong with these women?! Dan’s profile was shallow sexist and by no means pleasant, yet still some ladies couldn’t resist. Dan therefore decided to leave online dating to the physco paths and delete his profile post haste.
For those of you who didn’t view the profile it copy and pasted below…and I await your response ;)
However the scariest thing of all was that a chick from a rival volleyball team had a profile on RSVP, but sadly it wasn’t that hot chick from court 4.
The Profile:
(Again please keep in mind this was not a serious attempt at online dating!!!!!!!!!!!)
ChugMonkeyDan25
Hello and welcome to the Chug Monkey Dan experiment. As you’ve probably already noticed, the guys on this website appear to be from the shallow end of the gene pool. So when RSVP needed some fresh talent for their website and Brad Pitt was already taken, naturally I was the first person they contacted. So this is a limited time offer RSVP has set up for all you ladies to get on board the Chug Monkey Dan train…quite literally if you wish.
I’m currently a member of the world’s most famous indoor beach volleyball team…the Chug Monkeys. Each week my loyal fan base tunes in to read up on my crazy adventures and I bet you’d all like to be a part of them. Recently I’ve begun to search for a young lady friend to share my beach with. Only problem is I’ve recently had a rough trot with love. Like I totally had a crush on this hot chick from court 4, until I accidentally knocked her unconscious when I sent a powerful ‘Dan Slam’ her way during her match. Also I got a brick thrown at my head when I gave speed dating a try, but hey it could’ve been 2 bricks so I see it as a positive experience. You live and learn, you live and learn. I also tried my luck at a bachelor auction once too. Only problem was they said I couldn’t use the guy I bought to clean dishes and tidy my room. I tell you this dating thing is a minefield. So if you’ve ever wanted to date a celebrity or just someone really good looking, then please put those dreams on hold until you’ve met Chug monkey Dan! This is a limited time offer by RSVP until August 12th so get it quick. That’s always been my motto anyway!
My Interests
Music:
'We are the champions' by Queen, as its usually what they play when I’m being carried off the court shoulder high
Reading:
Yes I can read
Movies & TV:
I can totally pretend to like romantic comedies/chick flicks if it means I cash in later!
Sport:
As you should already know I have my own indoor beach volleyball team. That’s really all that matters
Other interests:
Did I mention the indoor beach volleyball thing already? As well my interest in volleyball, I may show you a vague amount of interest for a brief period of time, then it’s back my beach.
My Ideal partner
Relationship sought: Short-term Relationship with a Female
Intelligent, self respecting and a good sense of humour, how cliché! You’ve got to be hot, smoking hot! I deserve nothing less and you deserve nothing less than the full Chug Monkey Dan experience! If you don’t fit this profile, then not on beach, not on my beach!
Details
You should be
Age:
Between 18 and 27 years old
Location:
Adelaide, South Australia
Music:
'We are the champions' by Queen, as its usually what they play when I’m being carried off the court shoulder high
Reading:
Yes I can read
Movies & TV:
I can totally pretend to like romantic comedies/chick flicks if it means I cash in later!
Sport:
As you should already know I have my own indoor beach volleyball team. That’s really all that matters
Other interests:
Did I mention the indoor beach volleyball thing already? As well my interest in volleyball, I may show you a vague amount of interest for a brief period of time, then it’s back my beach.
My Ideal partner
Relationship sought: Short-term Relationship with a Female
Intelligent, self respecting and a good sense of humour, how cliché! You’ve got to be hot, smoking hot! I deserve nothing less and you deserve nothing less than the full Chug Monkey Dan experience! If you don’t fit this profile, then not on beach, not on my beach!
Details
You should be
Age:
Between 18 and 27 years old
Location:
Adelaide, South Australia
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